First of all Happy Holidays! I hope you’re having a wonderful season filled with love and warmth. I definitely am. My heart is bursting with love and my brain is bursting with revelations. This has been such a revelatory year! The irony is that I took this time to be still and to learn about myself and my connection to God, while having one of the most movement filled years of my life.
I have had a couple key revelations over this past year that have set me on my current path, but one main one this summer, around August, that has really helped me to understand more about my purpose on this Earth. One afternoon while washing dishes it came to me that I am a bearer of light, a keeper of love. I think I mentioned this to you before. That my purpose is to serve as a beacon of light and love even when things are grim so that it exists somewhere on this earth and can be found and shared. Arguably we all have this task, but I am awake to it and I acknowledge it as my purpose. Once I accepted this, it helped to explain many things about myself. Like why I am attracted to living and working in fragile environments where there has been conflict, poverty, and chronic injustice – essentially a lack of love. Why when I go to these places I am usually openly welcomed, a way is always made for me, people accept me into their homes even if we don’t speak the same language. Why people with dark / broken elements are attracted to me, with addictions, self destructive natures, chronic negative outlooks, paranoia, etc. We are attracted to each other because they are seeking a way to be healed and I am a healer. There is an immense healing power in just believing that something or someone can be changed, reborn, renewed. And in helping people believe this about themselves and their situations. I recently went to a workshop led by Michael Dove and he rightly pointed out that we all have within us a reset button. Simple but powerful. That is in fact what I have done with myself this year, pressed reset.
Thankfully I have become wiser and I realize that it does not serve me well or allow me to use my gifts well when I am constantly exposed to fragile environments and darkness. It drains me and depletes me to the point of being fragile myself. So this summer into the fall, when I was ready to start thinking about partnership again, I began asking for a different kind of partner. One who appreciates my role as a light bearer and keeper / beacon of love and who can offer me some protection, a safe space, peace and harmony in which to bring forth my gifts fulfill my purpose, someone who replenishes me instead of constantly depleting me. Would you believe, I think I have now manifested, with God’s help, this person into my life. It’s early days, but many synchronicities keep appearing that tell me I am on the right path.
But what made me stop washing the dishes and sit down and write you this email this evening is another revelation I had – there’s something about washing dishes that apparently makes my mind work lol. I was listening to Dr. Wayne Dyer on HayHouse radio just now and he was talking about love and the power that we have to manifest change in our lives through a deep understanding of ourselves as loving giving creatures first and foremost, or as he likes to say spirits having a human experience. This made me think that it’s time for me to take this healing / life coaching gift further. And that actually, without specifically setting out to do so I have begun training for this actively all of this past year, speaking with you, listening to HayHouse, familiarizing myself with the canon, reading all sorts of things, going to church more often, learning how to pray including via dance and movement, starting to go to workshops, learning about nutrition to heal my body… I have been very much thinking about where to go / next steps for 2012. And I became very clear this evening that one of my goals for next year will be to deliberately study the art of healing – mind, body, and soul – the art of creating personal peace and harmony in order to bring forth ones gifts. So in 2012, I plan to attend more workshops where I can interact with some of these masters, read more, learn about the history of healing through love including people such as Peter Deunov and others that I may come across, learn to meditate and develop a regular practice, and journey inwardly a little more, even perhaps start writing loose fragments of a book (whose subject I really don’t know yet and probably won’t until I start writing it…)
I am glad to be able to share these thoughts with you. And welcome any guidance you have.
Love and light,